Tingle Alley

chels:

The U.S. Polar Rock Repository. All collected rocks from the poles are catalogued here.

chels:

The U.S. Polar Rock Repository. All collected rocks from the poles are catalogued here.

Source: chels

The Boyfriend

Last night, Lowell and I were at the pub for dinner—cheeseburgers at the bar!—and in the Ladies a woman I’d never spoken to before stopped me as I was going into a stall and said, “Oh my god, that’s my high-school boyfriend out there talking to my husband.”

She was maybe early 30s, very congenial, and not the type to usually snag a female-friend facsimile in the Ladies (read: not drunk!). It was just that he was *THE BOYFRIEND*—I think she even said this, with quotes around it for emphasis—and she hadn’t seen him in a long time. So we chatted, then she took a deep breath and went back out. And then I went back out, and she and I didn’t make eye contact while I put on my coat, and I tried to not steal any looks at The Boyfriend. Which was extremely hard not to do. (I hope he was wearing a leather jacket and smoking a Camel, though.)

And scene! I don’t know why I love this so much except that I hope someday we are all very old and still having drama in the Ladies bathroom.

My grandfather with two of my uncles at a wedding rehearsal in the ’70s. One of my cousins visited last weekend, and he told me how on our grandfather’s side we’re descended from a Hessian mercenary who switched sides to fight for the Americans during the Revolution. After the war, he was awarded land on what’s now the Ohio-Indiana border, where a lot of my mother’s family, the Wienerschnitzels, remain multitudinous on the ground. (I’ve gotten a lot more interested in family history b/c of Maud’s The Begats book.) 

So Hessian mercenary? Huh, I don’t see it.

My grandfather with two of my uncles at a wedding rehearsal in the ’70s. One of my cousins visited last weekend, and he told me how on our grandfather’s side we’re descended from a Hessian mercenary who switched sides to fight for the Americans during the Revolution. After the war, he was awarded land on what’s now the Ohio-Indiana border, where a lot of my mother’s family, the Wienerschnitzels, remain multitudinous on the ground. (I’ve gotten a lot more interested in family history b/c of Maud’s The Begats book.)

So Hessian mercenary? Huh, I don’t see it.

There was a photograph in my parents’ copy of National Geographic’s Our Amazing World of Nature that scared the bejesus out of me when I was a little kid. If I was paging through the book, I’d flip past the spread with that photo, and then of course circle back and stare at it for a long, long time. Ocean creature similar to these guys. Grimacing face, lots of sharp little teeth. It was the reason I avoided touching bottom in any body of water—ocean, sea, Lake Michigan… little lake by my best friend’s family’s cabin up north. 

All of which is to say: These guys look so friendly. And dorky! They’re really doing great work rehabbing the whole Ocean Floor Creature With Teeth brand.

There was a photograph in my parents’ copy of National Geographic’s Our Amazing World of Nature that scared the bejesus out of me when I was a little kid. If I was paging through the book, I’d flip past the spread with that photo, and then of course circle back and stare at it for a long, long time. Ocean creature similar to these guys. Grimacing face, lots of sharp little teeth. It was the reason I avoided touching bottom in any body of water—ocean, sea, Lake Michigan… little lake by my best friend’s family’s cabin up north.

All of which is to say: These guys look so friendly. And dorky! They’re really doing great work rehabbing the whole Ocean Floor Creature With Teeth brand.

(via prettiestmonsters)

Source: dynamicoceans

"Surprisingly enough, the novel is entertaining, although the plot consists just of one fantastical and bizarre incident after another, without any of the suspense or character development normally considered necessary for a good novel. The tone, which is slyly humorous and ironic, rescues the book from the boredom brought on by a mere catalog of incidents. My favorite part is when dwarfs are pinched to death."

The last sentence. I really love Gothic novel synopsis.